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21 April, 2009

Problem Solving..........

This light hearted narrative was received from Benji, I think we can suitably draw a lesson out of it...... which is......."Every difficult problem can have a simple solution too".

 
EVER SINCE I WAS A CHILD, I'VE ALWAYS HAD A FEAR OF SOMEONE UNDER MY BED AT NIGHT. SO I WENT TO A PSYCHIATRIST AND TOLD HIM ...

“I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under it. I'm scared.. I think I'm going crazy.”

"Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the doctor. "Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears."

"How much do you charge?" I asked.

"Eighty dollars per visit," replied the doctor.

"I'll sleep on it," I said, and off I went to seek solace at my favourite watering-hole.

Six months later the doctor met me on the street.

"Why didn't you ever come to see me about those fears you were having?" he asked.

"Well," I said, "Eighty bucks a visit, three times a week for a year, is an awful lot of money!" I said.

"A bartender cured me for $10, and I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought myself a new car!''

"Is that so?" said the psychiatrist in a bit of a huff. "And how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?" "And in such a short time?"

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He told me to cut the legs off the bed! - "Ain't nobody under there now!!!"

08 April, 2009

How To Stay Young

This 10 Point Formula, reiterated by Pratim through his e-mail, though well known and practical, is practised by very few of us. Still, it makes sense to write it down and have a look at it at regular frequency, as some aspects will surely get imbibed, sooner or later.

1. Throw out non essential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay 'them'


2. Keep only cheerful friends.. The grouches pull you down.


3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.


4. Enjoy the simple things.


5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.


6. The tears happen.. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.


7. Surround yourself with what you love , whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.


8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.


9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.


10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity..


AND ALWAYS REMEMBER : Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.


We all need to live life to its fullest each day!!

05 April, 2009

Career Ya Stand???

This mail was received from Pratim, and has a very subtle message. Though it has the backdrop of the Army, I think it is equally applicable to most of the organisations. However, I was initially intrigued by the obvious spelling mistake in it's title - "Career ya Stand", as it was a mix of English and Hindi which was making it difficult to comprehend.

 
You may have heard the story of the young officer 40 years ago when he got a cycle loan and purchased one from the unit canteen.


The cycle was a beauty (the way mobikes/cars are today) but did not have a carrier at the back. So he sent his orderly to get one fixed.


When the cycle came back with the carrier fitted the Y.O. noticed that the stand was missing. He went to the CSD authorised cycle dealer and asked him why the stand had been removed.


He was patiently told, "Sahib ji, Fauj me ek hi cheez mil sakti hai- Career ya Stand. Agar stand loge to Career khatam or agar career banana hai to stand kabhi mat lena." (Sir, in the Army you can get only one thing...either career or stand. If you take a stand for something, your career will be finished.....and in case you want a career in the Army, then never take a stand)

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To compliment this, I have this mail from Railkar telling us about the strange cricket wisdom, and the summary of the observation, which I would like to alter so as to correlate it with the 'cycle' episode.


The first testicular guard was used in cricket in 1874,whereas..................
the first helmet was used in 1974.


Strange, it took 100 years for men to realize that the brain is also important!


My Theory - Man realised much earlier that b**** are more important than brain.